Relationship Services Whakawhanaungatanga

May I begin by greeting everyone in the languages of the realm of New Zealand, in English, Māori, Cook Island Māori, Niuean, Tokelauan and New Zealand Sign Language.

Greetings, Kia Ora, Kia Orana, Fakalofa Lahi Atu, Taloha Ni and as it is afternoon [sign].

May I specifically greet you: Shenagh Gleisner, Acting President of Relationship Services Whakawhanaungatanga and your fellow board members; Jeff Sanders, Chief Executive of Relationship Services and your fellow staff and volunteers; Hon Peter Dunne, Minister of Revenue and Associate Minister of Health; Hon Annette King, Deputy Leader of the Opposition and Grant Robertson, Member of Parliament; Your Honour, Judge Peter Boshier, Principal Family Court Judge; Distinguished Guests otherwise; Ladies and Gentlemen. 

It was with great pleasure that my wife Susan and I accepted the invitation to attend these 60th Anniversary Celebrations for Relationship Services Whakawhanaungatanga.  I register an apology for non attendance from Susan who has accepted a grandmother duty call which I am certain will be understood in this setting.

At the outset, I would first like to add wholehearted congratulations to everyone involved in the organisation for reaching this important milestone.  As Patron of Relationship Services it has been a genuine pleasure to have the connection over recent years.

More importantly I have gained the opportunity to learn more about the vital, life-changing work that Relationship Services does on a daily basis. I admire the mission which reads: “to provide quality counselling and education to enhance relationships for individuals, couples, families and communities.”  Relationship Services is a diverse warm-blooded organisation that, to use oft quoted phrases: “walks the talk” as well as “walking the walk”.

For most of the 60 years being celebrated, a number of my predecessors in this office of Governor-General have also had the privilege of serving as patron.

As we are here today to celebrate your organisation’s history, I would like to spend a few moments explaining how that relationship first came about.   You might be interested to learn that the idea of vice-regal patronage actually came from Government House and not the other way round.

We need to have the benefit of dipping into Jennifer Daly’s portrait of the organisation 20 years ago and to go back to the early 1960s when a newly appointed Governor-General, Sir Bernard Fergusson, was settling into his new job.

Marriage Guidance New Zealand was barely a teenager at the time, made up of teams of dedicated volunteers led by former prison chaplain Rev Les Clements. 

Familiar with the sterling work done by the New Zealand organisation’s British parent, Sir Bernard and Lady Fergusson were keen to offer their support to the local organisation.

On page 23 there is a delicious passage which goes as follows:

“One day, the telephone rang in the office of Les Clements.  Now, he had a friend who used to put on accents and was always pretending to be the Bishop, or General somebody.  Answering the phone, Les heard a voice say, ‘Governor-General… Bernard Fergusson here…’  ‘Oh, Hi Mac,’ Clements replied.  ‘Bernard Fergusson…’  ‘Yes, yes, I heard you the first time…’  But the fruity voice continued…’Bernard Ferguson here…’  I was so embarrassed, laughs Les.  Covered in shame and confusion I realized my mistake.  It’s a wonder it didn’t all collapse there!  He invited me to Government House where he gave me a few stiff whiskeys at ten in the morning, and we discussed Marriage Guidance.  He and his wife were genuinely interested … so sincerely in fact, that in February 1964, I invited them to become Patrons.”

Over the next four years, the Fergussons enjoyed regular contact with Marriage Guidance New Zealand, laying the foundations of the strong and warm relationship which has continued to be enjoyed by their successors.

I note that Jennifer Daly noted in her history that “the Fergusson patronage heralded an acceptance of MG in New Zealand”.  She further quotes Rev Clements as saying: “To the public it said: ‘If the Fergussons were on our side, we must be all right. And the Government took notice that Sir Bernard was patting them on the back for being supportive.’”

Nearly 40 years later, as Relationship Services Whakawhanaungatanga, you have gone on to become one of our nation’s most established and respected counselling services.  You have provided relationship counselling to New Zealanders across the length and breadth of the country, working with many thousands of New Zealanders when they needed help.

Today I have endeavoured to strike a note of respect and gratitude for where you have come from and of positive anticipation for what lies ahead in the next 60 years.

The success of this organisation rests on its ability to change and adapt as New Zealand has itself changed.  The change of name in 1994, recognising the changing face of relationships in New Zealand, has been just one of many adaptations.  Also recognised was the notion that the organisation provides counselling in many settings – for example, in addition to couple counselling, it also provides one-on-one counselling, counselling for whole families and for people in workplaces and in stopping violence programmes.

There was a time when anyone who reached 60 years’ of age, downed tools, accepted a watch, and went into retirement.  As I know from personal experience, those days are well gone.  I am confident, however, that we are all fortunate that Relationship Services will not be planning its retirement for many, many years to come.

Once again I add my sincere congratulations on this great achievement.   Your efforts have helped make our nation a better place.

On that note I would like to close in our country’s first language by offering everyone greetings and wishing you good health and fortitude in your endeavours.

No reira, tēnā koutou, tēnā koutou, kia ora, kia kaha, tēnā koutou katoa.